August and the first half of this month has been relatively uneventful so this will be brief. I primarily worked nights in August, except for Labor Day weekend but ended up getting really sick again. The previous Sunday night, I took care of a patient with a rash and, oddly enough, halfway through the night, my arms started itching. Thinking it was not a coincidence, I went to Occ Med at work to have it looked at and the NP didn't think it was anything to be concerned about. Friday morning, I got up and went to work and only then did I realize how crappy I felt. I was tired, my tonsils were huge, and I had a headache. I ended up spiking a fever later that day and pretty much went through the entire spectrum of viral symptoms for almost an entire week. Got tested for strep at the minute clinic (negative) and I still don't feel completely right. My cough lingered up until recently and I woke up with sore, sick feeling tonsils. Not sure what's going on but my immune system seems to have given up on me. Stress from the new job? Not surprised. Maybe my tonsils need to come out.
One weekday in the beginning of August, I went down to Keene for the day to see Amy and the kids. Meeting Veglia for the first time. We hung out outside for a bit before going inside. We caught up on our lives and headed to Brattleboro to have dinner at Becky's. It was nice seeing them.
On the 22nd, after waking up from my post-night shift slumber, Dayna and I headed to Montpelier to meet Colin and Katie Joyce for dinner and drinks. I've never ventured into the city before, it's pretty crunchy with neat little establishments all over the place. They are good people with great senses of humor. Good times! Colin is so much like my older brother. Hopefully going to see them in Syracuse sometime soon works out...probably not until next summer. The following day, I drove to Middlebury to meet them at Woodchuck Ciderbration to see the Dirty Heads play. So fun! Except for that weird encounter with a random guy who was clearly fucked up on hard cider plus other substances.
This past weekend, Dayna and I celebrated her birthday (tomorrow) in Manchester with some other peeps. Chicken fingers and mudslides at the Puritan Backroom, birthday cake shots at the British Beer Company, a cab ride with Gibbs, more drinks at Strangebrew, margaritas and pool time at the Holiday Inn Express. Good times and some good pictures to document the night. I really am no longer interested in having more than a drink or two every once in a while because I just end up feeling like crap but it is nice, in the moment, to feel like a younger version of myself. I do not want to get older.
Workwise, it is what it is. I count down the hours until the next shift spending that time with a certain degree of anxiety and stress thinking about the unknown. What am I going to be responsible for? Am I going to be able to handle it? Am I going to drown? Am I smart enough? Right now, the plan is to get through each day, one at a time, until at least next June. It has to get better with time and experience and I feel a professional responsibility to commit to a year after being hired and trained. Unless, of course, my emotional health becomes severely compromised...which is entirely possible. I feel like hating my job amplifies everything else I dislike about me and life in general. Maybe that's why I've been drawn to depressing/terrible youtube material lately. It's a fine line. On that note, I'm going to "relax" and eat ice cream. So thankful for the happy things in my life.
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