Cold, Rainy MDW

 It's a quiet, cold, and rainy Sunday afternoon. At the moment, I'm listening to cars passing by, rainfall, the hum of my fridge, and Xander's worsening congestion. I'm not sure if it's the pollen or what but he sounds terrible these days. I sent a video to the vet the other day and I may try prednisone...if I can crush it. Still waiting for an answer. I'm hesitant to give him steroids because it can compromise his immune system and put him more at risk for diabetes. I don't need another issue to deal because I'm also struggling with what to feed him. His kidney diet is giving him daily gassy diarrhea and the probiotic powder given to me by the vet doesn't seem to be making any difference. Luckily, I've recently joined a feline chronic kidney disease group on facebook and am getting way more advice and helpful information than I've gotten from any vet for the past almost 16 years. Xander's CRE back in October was 2.4 (upper normal is 2.1) so I guess his official diagnosis is Stage 2 (mild renal azotemia). His belly is not liking the renal diet (although he inhales it) so I've been struggling with what to do. At this point, I think I'm going to try a non-prescription diet with low phosphorus and see what his poops do. I want him to have normal poops but not at the expense of his kidneys. I need him around for as long as possible. I could have years or he could take a turn for the worst overnight. I just don't know but I know I'm going to spend as much time at home with him as I can and not feel guilty about it. Another decision I'm struggling with is when to go to CA to visit my Granny. I facetimed with her last week and she showed me her breast. The imaging was pretty blurry but it was obvious how diseased and uncomfortable it looked. She's in pain and she said it's even starting to smell. Her treatment plan is not working so now they've resorted to mastectomy (scheduled for June 11th). I feel pretty confidant she'll be fine during the surgery but there's always that "what if" and the associated guilt. I'm taking it week to week and hopefully, I'll know when the time is right to get on a plane. Having all this shit up in the air is so hard for someone like me. I need to plan and be prepared. I have no choice but to let things go and what will be will be. I just need to enjoy these quiet weekends and be ok with not being efficient and productive. Speaking of, I've barely accomplishment anything lately. I am, however, super close to officially purchasing a new couch. Yesterday was Barre-less...Mighty Yoga made the decision to shut down there Lebanon studio so now I will be trying our their Hanover studio. I vacuumed, did the dishes and grocery shopped. Today, I've done laundry and put beef stew together in the slow cooker. I figured that was a good choice for a rainy cold weekend. Later, I hope to take a tubby after some form of exercise. Tomorrow, I need to run errands and, again, do some form of workout. I may also hang with Erin. If there's time, I may tackle something on my to-do list. 

Last weekend was a good one. I went to my last Barre class with Angie Saturday morning (she's leaving the area for med school). I did some stuffies and headed to Norwich (after a pit stop at Red Kite) to hang with all the triathlon participants. It was much warmer last weekend. Had a few drinks and took advantage of the free food truck and brought home dinner. Sunday was quiet, I did some stuffies, read, facetimed with Granny and grabbed some groceries. Monday started great with breakfast at Lou's with Trista and then it got interesting. I poked around Allard's furniture for the first time and left feeling uncomfortable and with no plan to ever return. Apparently, the salesman never got the memo about how flirting is no longer an appropriate sales tactic. I immediately went to Brown's to see John again. Lazy Boy sectional it is. Will make it official tomorrow. Tuesday, I made the difficult? decision to end my friendship with Jen. I thought about it for a while but ultimately, I just cannot be friends with anyone who compares mask mandates to yellow badges during the Holocaust. I am sad for me and for Ashley because I really enjoyed our group but enough is enough. If I have to live in this world, I must remove toxicity from my life or else I'm not going to make it. Gross gross gross. Boy, I've seen much better days.

The previous weekend was fairly pleasant. Saturday morning, I went to Barre. From Barre, I went to Newbury for electrolysis (we are now officially working on my bikini line) and from there, I popped over to Pembroke to hang with Eric and Denise at their new house and eat take out OG...oooooh so salty. It is quite delightful. They officially moved in yesterday. I headed home to finish stuffies and spend the rest of the evening with the fluff. Sunday, I took a little jaunt in JJ's plane with Sara Bradburn at 1130. The weather was unfavorable so we only flew from Leb to Ctown and back after fueling up in Claremont. My mom and Ray came to say hello and I think they stuck around to see us take off. I spent the rest of the day running errands, grocery shopping, meal prepping and tubbing it. Monday was beautiful so, after doing a pile of dishes, I spent some time on the deck reading beneath my new umbrella canopy with the MacGyvered arm. I followed that with a walk. 

The previous weekend was pretty uneventful as well. Saturday morning, I got up and went to Barre. Did some Saturday stuffies then had a hair appointment in Hanover. I went straight to Ctown from Hanover to have a belated girl's night/birthday celebration for Jen with Ashley. Little did I know, it would be the last time we'd all be hang out. We toured and saged Jen's new house, got DDs and spent the rest of the late evening in Shley's basement with Tremont take out. We had planned another girl's night for my birthday this coming Friday but obviously that is canceled. Sunday, I grocery shopped, planted day lilies in my containers and meal prepped. Monday, I made spaghetti sauce, did dishes, had my every other year eye check up, cleaned my bathroom and went for a walk.

The previous weekend started with a see ya later Friday night outing to Jesse's for Trista. She has officially left me and will only return in August for some call shifts. She accepted an educator role at her local hospital. It's sad because she was such an ally and we stuck by each other during the whole Don fiasco but I'm happy for her. It's a great professional opportunity and great for her homelife. Saturday, I went to Barre, did Saturday stuffies, grocery shopped and went for a walk. Sunday, I meal prepped and went for a walk. Monday, I did dishes, did my monthly HOA business, ran some errands, and drove to Claremont to poke around Love's Bedding. Before that, I stopped in a Heather's to say hello. 

The end of April was a little rough. It was my Dad's birthday, we had a rash of young male STEMIs, and my Uncle David had bypass surgery (BTW, he is doing well) so I kind of freaked out a little bit and started bossing Jeff around. Whether or not he heeds my advice is out of my control but I hope he takes it seriously. At least when he dies young, he won't leave a wife and small children behind.

I am officially boycotting Red Barn Cafe in Ctown. 

Before this year is over, I will get another kitty. Age and source remains to be seen.

My RN license has been renewed...I worried about being audited for nothing because, due to COVID, they aren't auditing anybody.

Marjorie Taylor Greene is dangerous.

Vermont cut down the Yankee Farmer's tree.

Uncle Paul is getting a Watchman device. It was the first time he reached out to me since he randomly sent me a meme last August making fun of Michelle Obama. 

Speaking of fucked up familial relationships, Cora picked up the phone for the first time in forever and called me today. Um, no thanks. The last time I spoke with her on the phone, she insulted Sherry and Ross. Two siblings I barely talk to anymore haha. Oh well...this "family" is a sham.